February 16, 2009

Mmmm... coffeeee...

No, I'm not complaining about having to get up every morning and go to work; I'm just saying there is an adjustment period, a transition from pajama-clad "Mr. Mom" to shaving daily and wearing a tie. I'll get through it, but there are a few aspects of the unemployed lifestyle I had grown accustomed to, and at certain moments during the school day I suddenly realize how much life has changed. For example...

  • regularly scheduled program -- if the clock catches my eye at a certain time, I'll blurt out "whoa! The View is almost over, I'd better get that laundry done before Judge Judy starts!"
  • blurting out -- it's not that I talked to myself a lot, that would be a sign of mental instability, but if I wanted to make fun of or chastise the cat, or sing, or merely voice random thoughts out loud just to keep my vocal cords in shape for when the boys came home, I could. In the classroom, speaking out loud those random thoughts apropos of nothing is frowned upon. Something about modeling, setting a good example... whatever.
  • music -- had to push the Mute button on the soundtrack to my life; laundry day had its playlist, paying bills its playlist, eating all the leftovers from The Pancake House so the boys didn't know we went out to breakfast without them had its soundtrack...
  • coffee -- and eating/drinking/snacking/stealing from the boys' Valentine candy stash any time I had the urge; apparently, having a cup of joe and a box of 'Nila Wafers on the teacher's desk that could be knocked over through absolutely no fault of my own is not how to make a good impression on a Principal stopping by...
  • and the number 1 thing I miss from my life as a stay-at-home Dad: my bathroom. Do you know how hard it is to not only wait for the only free minute between recess and library when no students are clinging and no teachers are talking but to find a restroom without 12-15 women clustered around in the very near vicinity???

3 comments:

Slim said...

See...those are the little tid-bits that nobody every mentions. When you're meeting with a career counselor and discuss the option of teaching as a career they aren't going to ask about your bladder capacity. You have to get a Master's degree before that very important detail is brought to your attention.

Good luck with that. I'd never be able to do it. My bladder capacity is shameful.

Anonymous said...

Women teachers clustered around the vicinity?! Perhaps they are waiting to use one of the 3 stalls allotted to the entire adult female population...in an elementary school with a 20:1 ratio of women to men!

Maybe they are desperate enough to use the men's facilities.

Mr. Nauton said...

This is quite the progressive school: unisex, one-at-a-time facilities, but there are only 2I've found so far on the entire campus, and it's strictly against the rules to use the "boys" -- besides, everything in there is miniturized as if made from legos or something...